December 4, 2015


The Pilot got Peyton right after we started dating. I thought this was the most irresponsible thing he could have done. He was living with friends and interviewing to become a pilot.

We were kind of, sort of, not really dating, so I kept my mouth shut. After all, she was freaking adorable.

Fast forward three years and The Pilot and I were moving in together. Peyton and I had a rocky start. She was HIS dog and would bark aggressively every time we hugged. When we moved in together, The Pilot picked her up from his parents house, drove her to DC, and left the next day for a 4-day trip.

It was terrible. She was in a new place with a new owner. I think she thought The Pilot had left her for good. She shook uncontrollably and peed every time I walked into the room. Peyton and I, as roommates, were not off to a good start.

But things slowly changed. We started recognizing that we are a part of each other's lives. Slowly but surely, she became my "sweet pea honey bee." When my godfather passed away, and my grandfather later that year, Peyton put her head on my lap and licked the tears from my face. When we came back from Dubai in October, she was more affectionate than ever.

A few years ago, a friend of mine found out that their dog had cancer. They spent a fortune to treat their dog, who is now happy and healthy. I told The Pilot that if we were ever in that situation, we wouldn't be able to pay that. We wouldn't do it.

Well, on Wednesday, we found out that Peyton has cancer. I found myself at a veterinary oncologist yesterday and, this morning, we're dropping her off for surgery.

I can't even comprehend how much this is costing us. I tried so hard to estimate what this would cost and I came up short by $1,000...but what else can we do? Peyton is just as happy and healthy as ever. We discovered her tumor, which is just beneath her chin, two weeks ago, but she's otherwise, a normal, happy, over-excited dog who loves chasing squirrels. 

Our options are to have the surgery and, if all goes well, she'll be fine, or, we could leave it alone and let it keep growing and be forced to put her down in a few months. So, here we are.

This year has been so, so, so hard. At the start of the year,  The Pilot was living in St. Louis, training for a new job less than six months after our wedding. Once he got out of training, his schedule was wildly unpredictable. He would leave for a day trip and not come home for 5 or 6 days. It was hard, but I came home every night to a wagging tail and it made everything better.

Peyton was always The Pilot's dog, but over the course of our relationship, she's become mine too. The Pilot is away most of the time and having Peyton makes it so much easier. 

It took awhile, but I truly couldn't imagine my life without Peyton. She's our first baby, our little bee, and right now, we're doing everything we can to save her.

I don't know if that will be enough, but we have to try. 

So, here's to hoping.

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